The Electric Commentary

Monday, August 09, 2004

The unenviable task of following John Kerry through the Midwest

falls to The New Republic's Ryan Lizza. He's put together a stat sheet of Kerry/Edwards moments as they tour the battleground states. Among many other telling insights, we learn that the Senator will have a very full desk if elected:

Number of times in Ohio that Kerry pulled a buckeye out of his pocket and said it will sit on his desk when he's in the White House: 1

Number of times in Iowa that Kerry pulled a four-leaf clover out of his pocket and said it will sit on his desk when he's in the White House: 1

Remember when George 41 said that he didn't like broccoli and broccoli farmers and health advocates had a fit? John Edwards should be careful. The press keeps an eye on everything these days:

Number of pickles John Edwards removed from his hamburger at Wendy's in Newburgh, New York, where he and his wife Elizabeth celebrated their 27th anniversary: 2

We did find out that Kerry can hit:

Batting average of Kerry at a softball game in Taylor, Michigan: 1.000

Number of runs scored by Kerry: 2

And apparently he plays the game for himself, and not to impress anybody (either that, or he prefers night games):

Number of supporters left in outfield bleachers to witness Kerry's athletic prowess after he had arrived late and delivered a long speech during which the sun set: 0


Apparently, I can't read. Well, we all make mistakes. If you read the last part of this post earlier (and judging from our site traffic, you did not) I completely misread something that John Kerry said that was perfectly reasonable. We are nothing if not honest here at the EC, and to make up for it, check out this article on (via Instapundit) about John Kerry's stance on stem cell research.

Hey, it's an actual positive reason to vote for the guy!


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