The Electric Commentary

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

The new TMQ is

here. Some of the best bits:

In other NFL news, Thanksgiving has become Throwback Day, with teams to wear old-fashioned uniforms and old logos on the home page. TMQ suggests this menu for your own personal Throwback Thanksgiving:

  • Wild turkey, shot with a musket and hand-plucked.
  • Dried maize; no corn-on-the-cob.
  • Ample, overflowing servings of lobster. (The Pilgrims considered lobster tasteless and complained in their diaries of having to eat it so often.)
  • Seal meat.
  • Hard apple cider. (Till the early 1800s or so, hard cider was in rural North America considered the only totally safe beverage, because the alcohol killed waterborne pathogens; children often drank diluted hard cider and went through the day slightly tipsy.)
  • For dessert: plums, grapes and stewed pumpkin. (There is no chance the Pilgrims ate pie at the first Thanksgiving, because they had no refined sugar. Until the 1800s, most Americans rarely tasted anything containing refined sugar.)

As you dig into your turkey, stuffing and pecan pie, washed down with a $10 bottle of wine superior in quality to any wine available to the 17th-century kings of France, remember how hard your ancestors worked, and how they sacrificed, in the dream that someday their descendants would be warm, well-fed and secure against nature. Considering that your forebears just a century ago had an average lifespan of 46 years and often shivered during winters while eating mostly salt-preserved food, try to get through turkey day without complaining about anything, okay? Happy Throwback Thanksgiving!

and while I'm at it, here's Bill Simmons on the Artest melee:

O'Neal (25 games) -- This was the one that bothered me. On one of the Detroit TV websites, they have a clip of Artest fighting those two guys in front of the Pistons bench -- the situation was a little more dire than it seemed on the ESPN replays. When O'Neal landed his Kermit Washington punch, from the Detroit TV replay, it looked like that guy was getting up to charge Artest again before O'Neal belted him. More importantly, what were they doing on the floor? Doesn't that make them fair game? By all accounts, O'Neal is one of the best guys in the league -- he does a ton of stuff for his community, wins awards, all that stuff. The fact that O'Neal, out of anyone, was so upset out there shows how dangerous it was. I bet this suspension gets knocked down.

I don't care about his community service, but I agree that O'Neal's suspension is a little high. For one thing, Jackson was more than 5 games crazier than O'Neal. And O'Neal did stay on the court. I think that once a fan enters the playing surface he's fair game. This precedent is well established in football and I see no reason that it should not be applied to basketball as at that point players have to worry about their safety.


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