The Electric Commentary

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

In Honor of Jose Canseco

I give you:

The Roid King

(To the tune of The Rain King, by Counting Crows, from August and Everything After.)

When I think of playin'
(Delivered to me in a black briefcase)
I think of throwin' down into my gullet some
pills and liquids and all other
instruments of injectin' my bod
in the back of a black sports car

Wouldn't let you test me
When I was playin' before, but you deserve a little more

(Chorus)
When I played, I was never ever clean
Androstenedione, and that unknown Sheffield Cream
Mac is shootin'......The Mets are trippin'
And I am the Roid King
(Chorus)

I said Barry, Barry, Barry,
Why's your head so big*
It can't go outside
I'm scared it might not fit through doors
I'm alive.....not Caminiti
If there's a single clean MVP
I'd sure like to meet him
Wouldn't let you bleed me
When I was playin' before but you deserve a little more

When I played, I was never ever clean
Jason G is lookin' a little lean
Sam's been corkin'
And "it's" been shrinkin'
And I am the Roid King

Hey, I only wanted the same as anyone
Anderson's suspicious 50 home runs
Oh, it seemed that me and Mac were such good friends
After all, he let me inject him in the end.

When I think of playin'
(Delivered to me in a black briefcase)
I think of lyin'
runnin' round in a field and flashin' leather
Shootin' up my body with Mac, Kenny, Sammy and Jason
in the back seat of my black sports car.
Still don't believe me?
Cause I've done this before...and I could use a little more

When we played we were never ever clean
The biggest guys, that this sport has ever seen
We've been lyin'
and I've been drinkin'
and I am the Roid King

Yeahhh!!

*For more information on Barry Bonds' giant head click here, and watch the Sports Guy cartoon, "The Juice."

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