The Electric Commentary

Monday, March 06, 2006


A recurring EC segment in which two intellectual giants square off on the big issues of the day. Today's question:

In the State of the Union address, the President raised the possibility of banning human/animal hybrids. Is this type of scientific research ethical?

Human/Animal Hybrids are an affront to God.

by Pat Robertson, Former Presidential Candidate and founder of The 700 Club.

God created humans in his image, to rule over all of the animals. We are clearly differentiated from animals, as anyone can clearly see. You can see it in our intellects, and in our power.

Most of the time, I'm busy blaming hurricanes and comet strikes on homosexuals, calling for the assassination of foreign leaders, and faith-healing, but werewolves are quickly becoming my focus as we advance like a runaway freight train towards all sorts of dangerous scientific "progress."

Animals are a step backward. They are primal, relying primarily on instinct to act. If combined with the attributes of humans, they will become monsters. God once saw fit to destroy the sons of Cain, many of which can be described as creatures of this sort.

People, we are not meant to meddle with the genetic code. This is the very language of God, and when we meddle in that language, we create chaos. I suspect that nothing is capable of slowing this scientific juggernaut, but let no one claim that they were not warned.

Human/Animal hybrids will be an important part of the future.

by Animal, Drummer, Dr. Teeth and The Electric Mayhem.

Woman! Woman! Woman!

What Animal supposed to do? Surrounded by frogs and pigs all day. Which no one bats an eye at, by the way. Ha! Ha! Ha!

Weirdo and chicken get cooped up too. Animal have needs. Animal is unique. Human women seem to like animal. Animal bad boy. Haaahhh!

Chicks dig drummers.

Also, this type of thing is useful for insulin production! May have many applications!

Pat Robertson just jealous.

Mwahhh! Hah! Hah.

The EC would like to thank both of our panelists for participating. We look forward to having both of them back again for a future exchange of ideas.


  • This is an instant Choice Cut.

    Good show mate!

    By Anonymous Rashid Muhammad, at 10:53 AM  

  • That's good work. I heard Animal stink-fingered Miss Piggy.

    By Blogger Ace Cowboy, at 1:25 PM  

  • Thank you, thank you.

    Miss Piggy's a skank, anyway. He's done all sorts of things we can't even discuss with the guy who throws swordfish and the Swedish Chef. Weird, scary things.

    By Blogger PaulNoonan, at 4:08 PM  

  • Human-Wolf hybrid's would be sweet! So would a lot of other ones. However, I think the first step is to perfect casting skeletons out of adamantium and transplanting them in humans. That, or at least bring the exoskeletons currently being developed to market more quickly. I mean come on, its been like 15 years since the video Mech Warrior came out.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:55 PM  

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